Quote of the Day

A few years ago, (when I had only one child!), I muttered aloud to a good friend about wishing I had more time to write, about how work and family so monopolized me that I had no energy left for creative pursuits - for reading, for writing, even for exercise. Some time later my friend gave me a book: “If You Want to Write: A Book about Art, Independence and Spirit” by Brenda Ueland.

Ueland, a Minneapolis author who taught evening writing classes, often to women ‘homemakers’, published the book in 1938, and the title is somewhat deceiving. It’s less about writing as a craft and more about finding the freedom to foster individual creativity and pride. For me, the book has become a go-to source of inspiration and motivation on days when I am questioning whether to blog, or read my book club book, or run, or do any of those “low-priority” Google to-do tasks.

For example, she writes:

…[I]f you are always doing something for others, like a servant or a nurse, and never anything for yourself, you cannot do others any good. You make them physically more comfortable. But you cannot affect them spiritually in any way at all. For to teach, encourage, cheer up, console, amuse, stimulate or advise a husband or children or friends, you have to be something yourself. And how to be something yourself? Only by working hard and with gumption at something you love and care for and think is important.

I thought I’d share - just as a little reminder that whether you love to write, sing, or draw, to bake, craft or knit, to argue, campaign, or organize, to run, swim, or golf - it’s not just important to do those things “for yourself” - it’s necessary to your jobs as parent, spouse and friend.

Posted in Job of Mom | |

Is it like this in Australia?

In tribute (and with apologies), an attempt at parody of one of my favorite children’s books, then and still:

Leondra and the Overwhelming, Frustrating, No-Breaks, Very Mom Day

My husband hit the snooze button but forgot to turn his alarm off and I woke up to Firehouse singing Baby Don’t Treat Me Bad. Then 2 came in screaming and when I put him in front of the TV the cable was out and I couldn’t find his Bob the Builder DVD and his yelling woke up the dog who started yelping. I went to get a cup of coffee but the coffeepot had leaked all over the kitchen counter.

I knew it was going to be an overwhelming, frustrating, no-breaks, very mom day.

At breakfast 6 wanted frozen waffles, 4 wanted sweetened cereal and 2 wanted homemade pancakes. We were out of waffles and we were out of cereal so I made homemade pancakes. 6 pushed his plate away, 4 said I was mean and she didn’t like me and 2 pretended his pancake was a laser gun and pointed it at me while making shooting noises.

I can’t wait until they’re all grown up with kids of their own. (more…)

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Parenting 101: The Art of Annoyance

When I reflect on the things I learned from my mother, I find it’s the little things - the things that annoyed me at the time - that stuck with me the most.  For example, my mom was convinced that a person could go nowhere in life with chipped fingernail polish.  “Take that awful nail polish off before you leave,” she would say, ”your hands are the first thing people will notice. You can’t go around with chipped nails.”  

I would groan, and sigh, and roll my eyes.  But, to this day, I don’t leave the house with chipped nail polish (or, I do, but I feel completely self-conscious and apologize about it to everyone I see.)

So, now that Kindergarten has started, I have been developing ways to bug the crap out of my six-year-old in order to be sure I teach him important life lessons. I have to admit, this is a mothering skill (perhaps the first) the mastery of which has come really easily for me.  I just might have been born for the role of annoying mom. (more…)

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